As you have probably guessed from the title, I am having a case of writer’s block. I have all these ideas swimming around in my head but don’t know what to do with them.
I was going to write about graduation and even started writing but it was SO boring (not graduation, my writing) that I scratched that idea. FYI – graduation was great – a few tears and ok, it WAS boring in parts and I caused myself quite a few extra tears when I wiped my eyes, forgetting that I had rubbed Capsaicin (made of peppers) on my back earlier in the day due to a killer backache. I must not have washed my hands as thoroughly as I thought because I very suddenly forgot about my weepiness due to graduation and was now weeping in pain – mascara everywhere. It was not a pretty sight and this was RIGHT after we walked in!
Then I thought about writing about the infestation of silverfish we have experienced. Silverfish love wood shingles and I’m pretty sure they are procreating at a rapid rate in our attic. But that’s just gross and really, what can I say? Along with wood shingles they love piles of clothes and my girls have piles of clothes so until we get rid of the clothing piles, we will be sharing our home with the slithery little creepy crawly, disgusting, ugly, prehistoric looking creatures. Thank goodness they don’t get into food or cabinets or I would be moving out. Oh and the exterminators can’t GUARANTEE they can get rid of silverfish. Time for a new exterminator??
Here are some of my other ideas: Laziness, diets, basement cleaning, summer projects, exercise (again), my job (which the Olathe school district has jacked up), my kids (which I can’t write about because they would be either mad or embarrassed), swimming suits (yuck), that saggy skin under your neck when you get old, vacations, and I don’t remember what else.
Speaking of that saggy skin, I hate it more than anything (even more than saggy arms). I have been looking for a quick fix because I’m too cheap for surgery and well, that would just be vain, right? I bought this stuff called Double Chin Firming Facial Contouring Serum (hey it was on sale). And if the name wasn’t bad enough, here are the directions: For best results, apply a thin layer of DermaSilk Double Chin Facial Firming Serum to clean, dry skin on the soft, SAGGING SKIN under your jaw, neck and lower facial line. I love being 54.
Have a great summer and if I think of anything profound (or not) to share – I’ll be back. God Bless!
PS – I am most offended by the term double chin – it’s sagging neck skin and yes, there is a huge difference! Really, I’m not vain…
LMAO!! Oh goodness. What a name for that stuff… try saying that 5 times fast. Is it in tiny print so they can fit the nameon the label?
I agree. I’m also at a bit of a stop. Not that I don’t want to. I’ve thought about it a lot. But each time I think of what to write, I either think it’ll be a boring read or offend someone. Not that I have a lot of readers. I don’t think I do. But again, things get around even if you don’t tell anyone about them. Then some how they are sent to read. Then I have to listen to complaining about something that well, had already been discussed in person, but since I wrote about it, that’s what makes the person mad. bah. I use to write in a paper journal. You know, those old things that use trees, and you use these things called pens that have ink in them to write with. Yeah, back in the prehistoric times.
Regardless, I usually enjoy anything you write. Even the little ditty about the graduation and the pepper cream. That made me laugh too. Only because I can related and have done things like that myself.
Oh and I have found those evil little silverfish in my kitchen drawers before! So be warned… they do venture. I hate those and the huge ugly water bug-mammoth roach looking things.
Thanks, Jess. By the way, I am a faithful reader and I keep checking your blog looking forward to your wit and witticisms – it’s most enjoyable to me. Just write about your kids – they can’t read yet so they’re fair game – haha.
My daughter, Lauren, while trying not to laugh at me, was helping me soak up the tears and mascara caused by my unfortunate eye rubbing incident. It was a good time.
Thanks for the heads up on the silverfish – I may die.
I really don’t think you have writer’s block at all. Your post was hilarious what with the Capsaicin, silverfish (ewww), et al. And I can most definitely identify with the saggy skin part.
You might want to try Six Word Saturday (see the button on my blog) or Wordless Wednesday. My daughter does that one (Somewhere out There on my blog-following list) and you don’t even have to write anything. She has been kind of busy and hasn’t posted lately, what with a 2-year-old and in the 1st trimester of her second pregnancy (#4 grandchild for me!!) I saw a follow-up for Wordless Wednesday for Thursday where you explain your picture. You can probably find something for about every day of the week and there is no commitment. There is a WTF Wednesday but I’m not a fan of the f-bomb, but some of them are pretty darn funny.
I always look forward to reading your posts. And you can never out-dork me (trust me on that).
Oh thanks Melinda – I’ll go check that out! The problem is I have all these half ideas swimming in my head and they don’t really amount to one blog. Maybe the Six Word Saturday is the perfect solution!
Glad to be able to count a fellow-dork among friends!